The sheltering trees.

I awoke this morning feeling very excited. Two wonderful and dear friends are coming to visit me at the end of the week. Like me, both of them have had difficult times recently; disappointments, painful truths and betrayals, but I know that when we are together again all of those heartbreaks will dissolve into comedy. We will look into each others eyes with the understanding and love that the gift of over a decade of companionship and experience bestows.

In the past I have been accused of compartmentalizing my life; keeping work, pleasure and social circles separate. I knew I did this, I knew it could be painful for those who were close to me, but I couldn't help it. It kept me sane in my world of multiple personalities and identities. It allowed me to be who I wanted to be in any given situation without the eyes of someone who knew me as an 'other' witnessing my fraud. But some eyes do not see a fraud, they see a person growing in all their glory into something more than what they were before. These are the friends that I hold dear to my heart. As Elizabeth Foley once said "The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart." I cherish them as much as I do not mourn for the ones I have had to leave behind.

My Berlin self is different. Here, I am one. And I am so eager to introduce the old to the new. To show them who I am and to allow them the opportunity to touch each others lives as they have all touched mine.

Plus, it's a great excuse for zu viel Wein!!!

(BarGEfEsT 2008)